Getting information from the facility

[sandybeaches]

My fiance was sent to Vienna Correctional Center about six weeks ago.  He has called every day except today.  I am worried that something is wrong.  If I don't hear from him in a day or two will the facility tell me anything (for example if he is in seg, etc.)  I just want to know that he is ok.

[kiannie04]

You could always call the counselor, they have told me on the past when my husband wad sent t
o seg

[sandybeaches]

Thanks.  I will do that.  This is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. 

[seaturtle]

I can remember the first time I didn't get that regular expected call.  I was crazy out of my mind with worry.  Then a couple of days later I got a call and he was on lock down.  I would give it a couple of days or maybe even a week to see if he calls.  Sometimes it can even be that the line for the phone was too long.   Try not too worry too much, keep yourself busy and hopefully you will get that call.

My LO started out in Vienna, lock downs didn't happen all that often but they did happen.  Hope you get your call soon!!

[piirate]

Wow, I wish I could get a phone call every day.

[cinlu87]

I hear ya Piirate.  I hear from my hubby 3 times a week and that is if the CO wants to let them make calls...Such a bunch of BS.    SandyBeaches- don't worry when he doesn't call I am sure he is fine.  Sometimes there isn't enough time for all the guys to get the phones!!  I am so happy that you and Seaturtle that you get to hear from your LO so often. I pray for the day when my hubby gets transferred to the security level prison he should be in!!!   Have a great weekend!!!!!!!!!

[SisterLove]

  To sandy welcome to the ipt family. this is a hard situation to deal with, I remember the first time my call didnt come when it was supposed to I panic called to make sure he was okay and they were not on lock down then he call the next day siad that only one of the four phones worked and the line was long. Soemtims the phones go out sometimes they are not always able to get to them. Try not to get to worried because when my hubby was supposed to call and didnt I would go off like I was waiting he alwyas said I have no control over this situation so if I cant used the phone for whatever reason just know I miss you and Love you . So i let up off him and if he doesnt call I dont panic because I know he will call when he can.

[sandybeaches]

Thank you everyone for the reassurance.  In my head I know that it is not always in his control as to if he can call or not.   The problem is that with him calling every day I assume the worst when that doesn't happen.   I worry by nature and this situation is so frustrating.  I know it is far worse for him so I try to stay positive.  I do remember that the first weekend he was there the phones were down.  I had forgotten about that.  I pray that something like that is the reason he didn't call.  I would hope someone would let me know if he wasn't ok.

[Mcaballero]

Wow, I wish I could get a phone call every day.

Me too! Those calls get really $$$ after a while!

[SisterLove]

Sandy they usually dont call you when something goes wrong it is up to the inmate to make you aware, but you could call just to make sure he is not in seg if he does not call in a few days. I used to talk to my husband everyday at least three times for a few years but that gets very expensive so we still talk alot just not more than once a day, or we do a few calls a week but I see him at least five times a month or more if possible, and I write everyday.

[jcruz1104]

Sandy i woulnt worry, my hubby is in Vienna and i havent heard anything other then a bunch of guys waiting to use the phone, we talk every few days. so not expected to hear anything til tomorrow.. i am sure there are things going on. But if i hear anything i will def let you know..
but just remember its always worse when you over think...
just relax and try to keep busy.

[sandybeaches]

He finally called this afternoon.  Evidentally, he couldn't get to the phone.  He knew I was going to be worried out of my mind and got to the phone as quickly as possible today.  Evidentally there is only one phone on each deck.  I will try not to panic so quickly next time.

 Thank you to everyone. You kept me somewhat sane when I felt like I was going to lose my mind with worry.  It is nice to be able to talk to people who are going through or have gone through exactly what I am.  People don't understand what this involves until they experience it. 

[jcruz1104]

 

[Crowe29]

Don't worry sandy, panic is natural...i start to panic everytime he's late in calling me on the certain days and times we agree on...and usually 5 mins later he calls. He tells me he's like a horse out of a starting gate and running to that phone. Just be patient hon. P. S.  I too would love to get calls everyday...but i'd go bankrupt in a matter of months, lol!

[SisterLove]

  Sandy and Crowe I use to do it and it got very expensive and I have other responsibilities, if I want us to be able to survive once he get's home.

[jcruz1104]

i think its very expensive now! we try 2 times a week but then i have a bad week and ask him to call 3 times.. i HATE WAITING!  but its worth it and when i hear his voice, i fall in love all over again..lol..

[SisterLove]

J I talk to him a few times a week I'm saying The talking everyday seven days a week is very expensive. I remember one month I spent over 700 on call's I was like seriously, I should have stock in consolidated. I had to make changes because I still have to live out here and have stuff in line for when he get home One thing I love is he understand's and had no issue about the change, so we do 3 to four calls a week. When I have extra we do more than that but I dont go dcrazy if I can only do a few calls a week as long as I hear his voice And get to see him once a week I am all  

[jcruz1104]

my papaz is totally understanding too.. hes great! as for visits i proabably won be able to the entire time hes gone but keeping my fingers crossed that it changes. also when he needs money its always the min and when i can.  i love him & miss him..  :( 
you all have a great weekend! 

[kiannie04]

yes those calls are very expensive my husband had been calling every day but now calls three time Per week, when he doesn't call Im all worried and crying, can't concentrate at work, but it has a lot to do with his ex wife writing to him and that bothers me a lot, I end up just taking my sleping pills so that I can stop thinking. im tired of feeling this way... e, I don't km

[kiannie04]

  sorry sister love I lost my phone  for a while and finally got it back I'm truly sorry I didn't answer plus I have been so so depressed.

[SisterLove]

  Kiannie how are you doing from your post still not so good, Just remember that you will make it through this together it is very hard to be away from the one you loved more than anything in the world. I know how you feel I have been doing this for a few years and I just pray god gives me strength to keep us both going at time's I get upset, I cry at night I just miss him so much I don't always know what to do it is a blessing I have such great friends who understand and listen and encourages me. I also talk  to him alot about how I feel and he makes me feel alot better.
 I know the ex wife thing is unsettling you just have to trust that your love is strong enough to with stand anything. I'm praying that god helps you through everyhthing and those pills are not a good things to use to help cope with this situation. Being depressed is a state of mind that can be change just try to stay focus because he needs and you need to be healthy for your self.

[Crowe29]

My B used to try n call me practically every day...it was cute though cuz he was like 'well u know i can't help it' but then reality set in and it's 2x/week for us now...though sometimes when we have a deep conversation we talk for a whole hr and then have one more call later in the week so it's like 3 calls. But that's only in case we just can't wrap up in 30mins.

[kiannie04]

Thanks sister love, I just feel truly helpless and at times I just want to give up and move on...I don't like feeling like this just crying and sleeping and to top it off I need spine surgery, he has his hearing and I hope they let him out

[SisterLove]

Kiannie I pm you check it.

[kiannie04]

Ok

[Angela]

Wow, I wish I could get a phone call every day.

I just wish I would get a call.

[piirate]

Reading how often you guys get calls and visit makes me feel bad. lol. I get one or two calls a week. And I last got to see him in March three times and the time before that in October twice. I don't have a job job so it's hard for me to do all that. Plus they charge way to much tax on the phone. =[

[Kinnysbaby]

I know that we would love to talk to our loved ones everyday. But it is true it gets expensive I have been doing this for 15 years and it does not get easier. I keep myself busy with work and writing. I have not heard from my babes since last saturday. they went on lockdown a couple of days ago. I worry everday about him but he always assures me he has gotten use to the lockdown. Kainne04 try and no it is not easy to get depressed, i take medication for depression everyday. There are days i don't sleep very well or I don't go to sleep until a couple of hours before I have to go to work. I will keep you in my prayers but just know one thing you have more strength then you think you have. Your sad right now and that will pass. You are a strong woman you can do this. Don't give up on your loved one, they need you just as much as you need them. I hope things go well with your surgery.

[SisterLove]

  Piirate,

[SisterLove]

So True kinnysbaby and those calls add up fast and adter you have been doing it a while you can almost bankrupt yourself me and my boo had to make changes if he wanted to see me as often as he does. We write more and I visit very often mostly about once a week. but you have to do what is within your means so you can still take care of you on the outside. Piirate I pray you are blessed with a job soon I have been in that situation and it is rough but god will make a way.

[piirate]

  Thank you.